Obelisk Storm

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The Obelisk Storm was an event in which 1/3 of the population of the planet Bad Egg was suddenly imprisoned within indestructable obelisks that rose from the ground around their feet. It was seemingly triggered by a meteorite crashing into the north seas.

The event had catastrophic repercurssions worldwide, disrupting many industries and interrupting the lives of all mortals, especially on Etowana, where most of the storm occurred.


In Etowana, the majority of the victims of the Obelisk Storm were members of the upper class and employees of the Paper Company. Because of this, it was widely believed that the event was an act of revenge on the planet's part due to the severe pollution being created by the company. While the Storm wasn't enough to dismantle the company, it initiated a chain of events that eventually led to the company's downfall.

In Normalvalley, people were completely unaware of the event as seemingly no obelisks were found and their isolation from the rest of the world kept them uninformed for years. Only a single obelisk was discovered, by Speeny Weeny, leading to a period of psychosis that resulted in formation of the Cult of Blokus that terrorized the valley in the following years.

While Mrs. Claus was a victim of the Obelisk Storm, Santa Claus was spared. He believes that if he hadn't been in the skies at the time, he would have been taken.

Known victims

  • Back Ache
  • Samuel Bauer
  • Skylar Benavidez
  • Mitch Boan
  • Big Buford
  • Medium Buford
  • Small Buford
  • Bobby Bunny
  • Mrs. Claus
  • Ynq Tnk Cam'ron Coleman
  • Lawyer Cousin
  • Stillborn Cousin
  • Isaac Draper
  • Gudrun Duplessis
  • Dorian Electra
  • Ghepo Euphoric
  • Phroebe Esdie
  • Baldur Gates
  • Gigi Hadid
  • Richard C. James
  • Gotstyle Jose
  • Drake Josh
  • Leiland Kellogg
  • Henry Kissinger
  • Stanky Legg
  • Gene Leonhardt
  • Sonny Les
  • Ed Lever
  • Bread Loser
  • Ben Luchene
  • Alexis Marshall
  • Prosperity Mathis
  • Chinese Mike
  • Dick Mike
  • Crap Mop
  • Mallinckrodney Mullen
  • Lilith Mustard
  • Lymph Node
  • Brick Owens
  • Joe Patrician
  • Risotto Pavarotti
  • Guy Pebble
  • Thraber Poop
  • Tom Reggae
  • Connor Scavenger
  • Patrick Schneeweis
  • Dick Scrobble
  • Shamrock Shake
  • Tack Shooter
  • Sanchez Singleton
  • Chip Skylark
  • Don Smoot
  • Greg Stalin
  • Racksboyy Swervoo
  • Bryon "Hotdog" Tate
  • Turnmeup Tim
  • Ginsengstrip Toothouxantoo
  • Small Travis
  • Pat Trillman
  • Craig Whiskey
  • Darrick Silky Wimple